Generally speaking I don’t have penis envy, except when it comes to urinating.
Because boys can sort of pee anywhere. On a tree, in the snow, some even show off with a soda can. It’s like a Dr. Seuss of Number One.
But I’m proud to say that the glass ceiling of urination has finally been broken. And there are splatters everywhere.
This morning I read about a woman who urinated in a patient’s kitchen sink. Well, unfortunately the woman in question is a nurse and the patient is a one year old child with special needs, so she’s been charged with lewdness and child endangerment, but that’s sort of besides the point, don’t you think?
Small price to pay for inspiring a generation, I say.
One year ago ...
- Bucket List - 2013
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
Well I can pee on my feet,
or on the street
or on a chair
or really, anywhere!
Great channeling of Dr. Suess! Of course you have to give Marinka credit for inspiring you.
I agree on the small price, but I still can’t understand the whole story behind this. I mean – WHY? I can barely reach my kitchen sink to do the dishes, not to mention hefting my entire body up there for a communal pee. I mean, It’s not like I get to pee alone, being a mama and all, like you know, so why go to all that bother?
Twitter: gonnakillhim
November 4, 2010 at 11:48 am
I’d sooner wet my pants than trouble myself to use the sink. My undercarriage has been stretched to such a degree that I pretty much do all day anyway so what’s a little intention behind it?
Amy Poehler made it look good, though.
Twitter: wacdance
November 4, 2010 at 12:22 pm
I would think that the sink is far more difficult a place to urinate than the toilet. I am only 5’2″ so maybe it just seems too hard. Sadly, nothing shocks me anymore. People are so bizarre!
Twitter: scarymommy
November 4, 2010 at 12:24 pm
When I was younger, I had a sink in my bedroom. Just a sink, not a toilet. Well, when I had to pee in the middle of the night, I would hoist myself up on the sink and pee in it, rather than walk down the hall. (Mind you, it was a two second walk in an old Victorian house- this was no huge mansion.)
I was so gross.
It’s a marvel that I’ve managed to be a semi-functioning member of society since then.
That leaves all kinds of questions – were there dishes in the sink? Did she wash them after? Maybe she didn’t want to leave the kid alone, so it was a good thing? She was cold and needed a sweater?
The stand up and pee thing – come look at our guest bathroom after a bunch of guys use it. We wonder about that sprinkler attachment that gets it all over the floor and walls and cabinets. Better maybe to just sit down.
Urinating into the sinks as well as having sex with the nurses in the ICU is time honored privilege of the Russian physicians.
Does it have anything to do with the demonstration of the privilege and “penis envy�
Definitely.
Twitter: lanieree
November 4, 2010 at 4:15 pm
Have you heard of the GoGirl? I want one for Christmas.
I have complete penis envy. When I come back in my next life as a man I am going to do everything with my penis. Flash people, pee everywhere, write in the snow. I will be unstoppable Penis Man. Mwahaahahaha.
But I’m proud to say that the glass ceiling of urination has finally been broken. And there are splatters everywhere.
Dying to know what this means. Like holding my breath DYING!