A few things happened this week that made me realize that I was old. Here they are, for your mocking amusement:
1. On Tuesday, my physical therapist texted me to confirm my 3 p.m. appointment. And I wanted to text back “ok” or “great”, but hipper and cooler. So I texted back “G8”. I was thinking GR(eight). Not G(eight). Maybe she thought that I was inviting her to a summit. Oh God, I just asked Husbandrinka if there is such a thing as a G8 Summit and he said that he thinks it’s G7. So now I’m old and stupid. (Update: Apparently, there are both G7 and G8 summits.)
2. I got reading glasses. Husbandrinka said that they look “goofy” and the kids told me that they make me look like my father. Which isn’t really the look that I was going for. But I was reading in the bedroom and Husbandrinka came in to say something to me (along the lines of “you’re old and stupid”) so I took my glasses off to look at him. And he’s all, “why do you keep taking off your glasses when you look at me? You don’t want me to see you wearing them?” And I’m all, “No, because they’re reading glasses and I don’t need to have you magnified.” See, these are the types of conversations that I assumed that we’d be having in the Assisted Living Village, so it’s nice to have a preview. A preview that I can see fine, by the way.
3. Over at The Mouthy Housewives, Kelcey wrote about defriending people on Facebook and I thought, “oh, poor thing. I have to tell her that it’s unfriend.” So I emailed her and she e-laughed at me, saying that it was so cute that I thought that it was unfriend, but it’s defriend. And I was all. “ha! She thinks I’m cute!” but then I realized that Kelcey thinks I’m cute in the same way that she thinks that her dad is cute. Whatever. I did some internet research, and there’s a really lively debate about the whole defriend vs. unfriend issue. Unfortunately, to understand it, you have to download one of those flash applications that all the young kids are using and I don’t want to mess with that stuff. But I’m pretty sure I remember being in a cave and my friend getting mad at me and crossing my image out on the cave wall, while grunting, “I unfriend.”
4. There are many more examples, but I can’t remember.
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In the As the Bagel Turns news. Husbandrinka continues to eat only half a bagel on Saturday mornings. Last week, he threw me for a loop by eating a little more that half. This week I beautified the fruit bowl to prepare for the bagel. And I wasn’t disappointed.
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{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }
is that your wedding band on the banana? are you threatening divorce over a half bagel saga? And is this the new era of infidelity?
Twitter: Mamabirddiaries
February 6, 2010 at 1:16 pm
Oh marinka, despite your age, I’ll never defriend or unfriend you.
What’s with the wedding band on the banana?
Let’s see the glasses. And not on the banana.
I don’t even know what a G8 summit is. Or G7. Or any other kind of summit, actually, so what does that make me?
And I can confirm that it IS, indeed, UNfriend.
Twitter: HipMom
February 6, 2010 at 2:37 pm
I love Kelsey, but defriend just sound wrong and weird. I vote for unfriend to be the established, official form.
And hello, what about a photo with your reading glasses? I’m sure you don’t look like your dad. Though of course I woulnd’t know because I have never met him. But I will say you don’t, I promise. is that encouraging at all?
i’m with you and “unfriend.” sorry you look like your father, not that i’ve seen him…but still.
Twitter: CocoAtScreaming
February 6, 2010 at 3:43 pm
You just catch it from all ends don’t you. Just ignore them. That will drive them nuts.
Twitter: jukeboxbarb
February 6, 2010 at 4:25 pm
I know that your dad is very handsome and you should be honored to look like him. p.s. i don’t really know him but assume he is.
Baby.
it’s alright Marinka- i feel your pain.
the other evening at a intimate dinner for a friend’s birthday, the bill arrives. me being the techie that i am (not), pulled out my iPhone to use an app that calculates how much each guest must pay and allows you to adjust the tip %.
All is fine- we each owe $91 including the tip-fine- but the waiter returns and informs he was only able to split the actual meal’s cost and the tip had to be written in.
Well- after three vodka drinks I couldn’t remember what the “app” had said the appropriate tip amount was….so i casually say: “Oh, let me pull out my ‘MACHINE’, the numbers will still be on it.” “Birthday” boy- who was sitting across the table heard and mocked me- calling me gramps. uggh- my “senior” moment for sure.
Twitter: slowpanic
February 6, 2010 at 8:45 pm
but have you lost your reading glasses and spent 10 minutes looking for them only to find them on your head? no? then you are not unyoung yet….
or have you sat on a plane knitting with your reading glasses on your head? no? still not unyoung.
i am so old….
1. Well, after reading carefully, I’ve come to theeducated conclusion that from evidence 1 and 2, it’s pretty clear you’re not the stupid one.
2. Glasses is sexy, not old.
3. What up with the rings?
4. Lady Ashfield: young people today are soo flighty. I also use the “machine” word. And I’m as cool as… as…. as something extremely cold. Like my feet. Yes. Where am I?
I just can’t not say something. I strongly urge you to refrigerate your apples. Also – doesn’t that bagel go quite stale, quite quickly? And is he eating something else with the bagel or does he have the appetite of a small bird?
Are you being de-G8-ful by placing your ring in the bagel/fruit bowl?
I realize that Slow Panic just mentioned this hideous phenomenon, but truly, a depressing and defining moment for me was the first time I couldn’t read a medicine bottle or some such thing and searched the house for 30 minutes for my glasses, only to find them on my head. I suddenly COMPLETELY understand many things about my mother, which is very scary. Like the way she kept a pair of glasses stashed in strategic places around the house, arranged in order of their attractiveness. For instance, the newish, moderately attractive reading glasses (oxymoron, I realize) were in the living room where she sat and read, while the old taped together broken ones were in the laundry room (so she could read laundry instructions on tags – I get this now) where no one was likely to see her. It has ALL come clear.
BTW – unfriend. Absolutely.
I LOVE Gretchen’s mother!
Twitter: BigPieceofCake
February 7, 2010 at 2:15 pm
All I have to do is look in the mirror and see the wrinkles that continue to zig zag around my eyes in brazen disregard of the Cindy Crawford approved magic serum I apply every night. Apparently, my wrinkles have a bit more spirit than Cindy’s do…
But I’ve always thought that purchasing “World Music” CDs from Whole Foods was a pretty good indicator of lost youth.
I bet you look great in your new glasses. What do husbands and children know anyway.
OMG! Is that a ring? I have to say that is way better than a half a bagel. PS I think glasses can make one look sexy.
Old? Don’t worry, you’re not alone. Last week, after I introduced my daughter to the art of using a phone book as a booster seat, she asked me what else I used to do “in the olden days”.
Sigh…
Bagels and diamonds are always a good combo…
Twitter: SweetPeaSurry
February 8, 2010 at 5:41 am
Are those … rings? Rings in the half bagel half fruit bowl? Rings on the banana? I’m coming to eat fruit at your place … I like the suprise gift in that breakfast bowl!!!
oh, I thought that was a washer on the banana . . . wait, let me get my glasses . . .
I love the cave line so much I’m going to steal it!
See- the social networking thing makes me feel all young – because when people who don’t understand Twitter say “i don’t have a twitter” i get to chuckle knowingly and say, ‘It’s ‘I’m not ON Twitter” then chuckle some more. Then i get out the magnifying glass to read the Sudafed box.
I knew I was old the day I called my best friend to brag about my cholesterol test.