The other day Husbandrinka took Young Ladrinka to see the pediatrician for something unimportant and she said that he had a slight 99ish fever and might be getting sick. Young Ladrinka seized on this news like a pit bull on a young child’s leg and would not let go. When I came home, he told me that his fever was really spiking and he’d have to miss school, and Husbandrinka told me that he didn’t know where the thermometer was. I quickly located the thermometer in Thermometer Central and took Young Ladrinka’s temperature, which registered at Epitome of Health (knock wood), 98.6.
Young Ladrinka was crushed. See, he had already planned a day of watching TV and relaxing and this no-fever nonsense was screwing up his plans. He said he wanted to take his temperature himself. He took the thermometer and shoved it so far into his ear that I was certain that he would reach middle earth. And then he did what I can best describe as straining in an effort to get his temperature up. It didn’t work. He tried the other ear, in the hopes that it was more feverish. More bad news.
It’s hard to see your child’s dreams dashed.
So tonight I asked him to re-enact it for me. He bargained hard and finally we agreed that his pain and suffering was worth $5. And then, because I have no idea how to upload the video, my daughter charged me $5 for that. This blogging is a real money loss for me. (And when I gave Young Ladrinka a crisp $5 bill, he complained that it looked “totally fake.” I guess he thinks that I have a money printing business on the side.)
But, don’t worry about me, I’ll scrape by. Enjoy. I think you’ll agree that it was worth every penny.
One year ago ...
- Bedbugs - 2010
{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }
cheer up. . .maybe he’ll start throwing up. . .
Haha. I love the look on his face…kind of like he’s constipated. 😉
Brilliant. I give him an A for effort. That was worth at least 10 bucks.
On the upside, there’s a good chance he’ll poop his pants if he keeps doing that and then he can claim diarrhea and still get to stay home.
Twitter: MFA_Mama
September 22, 2010 at 10:48 pm
Pitbull is one word, and they don’t really eat (or even bite) young children. Trust me on this; I purchased one for the express purpose of bringing my three unruly children into line and she has failed to so much as injure any of them. I know, I’m disappointed too. Clearly she is an antisemitic dog who wants me to be unhappy.
Twitter: mommygeekology
September 23, 2010 at 7:22 am
Awww, but he’s such a cute little guy!
Breaking the thermometer would be top priority if I were .
Hearing your voice was a little strange for me. in my head you sound like that Russian spy lady from Rocky and Bullwinkle or my little old Lithuanian ( Spelling is not my strong suit) great Granma! hahaha! But I think he should have tried harder… tell him to contact me I have some tricks that might hlp hi get out of school next time! lol!
I practiced the same craft very many years ago. My mother sent me to the school for the “working youth” to complete high school.
The school had sessions only 4 times a week, and if you cut 2 of them it became only twice a week….and the Georgian wine was dirt chip.
He’s ADORABLE!!! But you might wanna tell him to be VERY careful about straining that hard…something may come out the other end and that’d just be GROSS!!! Why, yes Marinka – I HAVE had that happen…not to me, one of my children. Playing around and ended up messing his pants. The REST of us got a laugh out of it…he didn’t think it was to funny.
lol that is a great one! its especially funny trying to watch him make his temperature go up!
Twitter: Mamabirddiaries
September 23, 2010 at 10:16 pm
why can’t you just let him stay home b/c he’s so cute.
Hmm. As a kid I would distract my mother during the temperature-taking-fiasaco. As in, “hey mom look over THERE”…pointing furiously behind her back. THEN take the thermometer and hold it against the light bulb in the lamp beside my bed….tic toc…. Am I the ONLY one that did this?
I agree with “the mama bird diaries”, Young Ladrinka should be allowed to stay home just because he’s so cute!
Twitter: annsrants
September 26, 2010 at 10:34 am
A perfect dishwasher loading-intensive opportunity thwarted by the ear thermometer.
He is ADORABLE and forgive my BOGO commenting.
why can’t all forms of quality entertainment be $5?!? 😉
that video is hilarious, and your son is so adorable!! Watch out GQ!