One of the ongoing mysteries of my life is why my son cannot place trash into the trash can.
This is sequel Mystery of Why The Laundry Does Not Get Placed Into the Hamper and is being sold with Why The Dirty Dishes Relax In the Sink as Opposed to The Say, Oh, I Don’t Know, The Dishwasher.
It’s a mystery that can keep me up at night. A mental page-turner, if you will.
So as I was saying good night to Young Ladrinka last week, I spotted this candy wrapper and snapped a picture. And then I had to turn the light back on to get a clearer shot and he asked me what I was doing.
So close and yet so insanely far omfg, why can't it just go into the trash?!
“I’m gathering photographic evidence,” I explained. Because he has the right to know.
“You’re going to put it on Twitter or on your blog, right?” he asked. “Because you think then I’ll feel embarrassed and pick it up.”
“Why would you be embarrassed?”
“Because you’ll be like ooh, look, other moms! My son’s candy wrapper! And they’ll be oh, ha ha, my son does that too!”
“So maybe you should pick it up then, in order to prevent the humiliation.”
“Whatever.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I don’t care what you post on your blog, I’m not going to read it.”
I may have to rent a billboard.
One year ago ...
- The Other Gift Buying Guide - 2013
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
Twitter: highlyirritable
December 14, 2011 at 2:23 pm
Sometimes when one of my kids does something stupid or amusing, the other one says in a sing-songy voice, “Blog Fodddddder….”
Let me know when you find a tactic that works, because according to my kids, online shaming is *so* 2004.
Twitter: mommyshorts
December 14, 2011 at 3:11 pm
Uh-oh. The written word isn’t working. You may need to post a picture of him so that we can all shout at Young Ladrinka on the street. “WHY CAN’T YOU JUST GET IT IN THE TRASH?!”
My HUSBAND puts laundry on the LID of the hamper, it drives me absolutely batshitinsane. And when I caught my 6yo daughter doing it the other day, she explained that it was “because I want to be like daddy.” I almost exploded.
Twitter: fromtracie
December 14, 2011 at 6:14 pm
Right now there is a wrapper on our floor, by the trashcan, that I am refusing to pick up….it is my husband’s.
So close.
Jam it in his gum cup and make him wear it as a festive hat. Then we’ll see who’s so laid back.
Twitter: NorthWestMommy
December 14, 2011 at 10:46 pm
I think it is time to tell him that baseball scouts read your blog.
hahaha so funny
I leave my trash on the kitchen counter, instead of opening the cupboard door and lifting the lid to the garbage. Once the pile is big enough, I do it all in one trip. Dives my husband craaaaazy! I just don’t like touching the garbage/washing my hands repeatedly.
Oh, Lord this is my future isn’t it? Several years from now I’ll be having this exact same conversation with my daughters. Better stock up on liquor.
Oh this reminds me of this summer when I kept a countdown of how many days a certain somebody’s sock stayed on the stairwell…I posted it on my site and we all placed bets.
We’re moms we need all the cheap entertainment we can get!
Contributing to the matter of the development of the self centered future male chauvinist pig.
Mama bought brownie yesterday to be shared with him, his sister and herself.
He demanded to use a ruler to make sure that he will not be shortchanged.
Don’t the trash fairies come around and pick that stuff up?
Twitter: marta28
December 15, 2011 at 6:49 pm
We have the same problem in our house or worse this:
https://twitter.com/#!/marta28/status/146774248973799424
How about we all make fun of him instead? What’s his facebook name? I’ll totally start calling him Trash Boy for you.
Twitter: byrnealaina
December 16, 2011 at 12:06 pm
My husband does the ole “put the dish on the counter above the dishwasher instead of IN the dishwasher”. I hate that it bothers me more than him. Bastard.