Goal

You know how most couples have a common goal? Whether it’s to pay off your mortgage, live a more green life, be able to pay for your kids’ college, start swinging?

Whatever they are, these are the goals bind couples, the journey and the struggle towards the goal empowers them. There’s no reason to restate the goal out loud all the time, it’s in the fabric of the relationship, it is an understood element.

So imagine my surprise when Husbandrinka pulled out the fabric of our goal from under my feet. Did I say surprise? I meant despair.

If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you probably know that Husbandrinka and I have been working toward a common goal of getting more cats. We got our beloved Nicki a few years ago, and after Husbandrinka had a few cardiac incidents (very minor, and mostly entirely his fault) pertaining to her, we both looked at each other and knew that bringing Nicki into our lives was a wonderful decision and that the only thing that could make it better was to have more cats join our happy home.

But although this was our goal Number One, we faced some obstacles. Yes, obstacles. Two, to be exact: Our daughter and son.

Because if there’s one thing that kids can’t stand it’s adorable kittens.

Husbandrinka sort of gave up on our dream of being full-time cat people, and distracted himself with things like “work” and “life” but I, what can I say? I’m an optimist. I see an obstacle and I think of ways to overcome it. Preferably a non-strenuous way, so I can enjoy a glass of wine while I do it. But still. I’m pretty sure John Lennon wrote Imagine with me in mind. I guess we’ll never know now.

Anyway, back to me. And my heroism.

A few weeks ago I took matters into my own hands and had a sit-down with Young Ladrinka.

“Listen,” I told him. “I’d like to get another cat. Where are you on this?”

And it turned out that he was at the intersection of “Why Just One?” and “Yes, Let’s Get One Right Now!”

I couldn’t have been more overjoyed. My daughter was still not home, but I wanted to share the progress I made with Husbandrinka.

As you can see, I anticipated that Husbandrinka would not believe his good fortune, so I had Young Ladrinka add a personal message.

And then we got a response:

Do you see how he completely ignores our dreams and hopes and only focuses on his own selfish desire not to be demolished?!

This is exactly why we have to elect a President who will put an end to government handouts.

Obviously things have been a bit tense around here, and Husbandrinka has been exiled on a “business trip”, but this week I decided to try a different approach:

See, I consider this to be a perfect email, because (a) it provides a scientific basis; (b) it gives Husbandrinka an option of a second opinion; and (c) it’s filled with lies. That’s the trifecta that you want in your marriage.

And yet, this was his response:

I don’t know. It’s really hard to have a happy marriage if only one of the people is really trying.

P.S. Young Ladrinka suggested we get another cat and maybe Husbandrinka wouldn’t even notice.

One year ago ...

• Period - 2013