From the monthly archives:

August 2011

How To Take The Escalator

August 19, 2011

So, you’ve decided to take an escalator! Congratulations! This is going to be an awesome day. Just follow these simple instructions and soon you’ll be on your way, either up or down! 1. Walk onto the escalator. Do not pause in front of the escalator and ponder your life, this week’s episode of Project Runway […]

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TADA! Except.

August 17, 2011

I’ve been writing this post in my mind for weeks. For months. I’ve hinted about the Writing Project with my beautiful daughter, I’ve told you that I’ve had to unceremoniously replace her because she was dragging her feet and wasn’t getting what needed to be done fucking done. And now I can reveal all. Or […]

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I Was Wrong

August 16, 2011

It’s amazing what a difference a few years make. In December 2008, I wrote this. And I meant every word. Go ahead, read it. I’ll still be here. I truly believed that lice was an unfortunate but natural part of life. That it was no big deal. But that was because I was an idiot […]

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I’m Right, You’re Wrong: Fashionably Late

August 14, 2011

As if this whole credit downgrading scam wasn’t bad enough, friends, we’re on the brink of an international incident. Thank goodness I’m Right, You’re Wrong is here for the rescue! Because apparently in our family, a 7 pm dinner invitation means two different things. Dilemma: When someone invites you to dinner at 7 pm, what […]

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So Good, They’ll Think It’s For Them

August 12, 2011

This post is sponsored by Hillshire Farm. Excuse me, but what is the normal age, developmentally speaking, for siblings to stop bickering? The whole “he started it”/”she looked at me”/”he is stealing my oxygen” type of bickering that makes otherwise sane parents retreat to the bathtub and rock themselves back and forth gently. I’m asking […]

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Wardrobe Malfunction

August 11, 2011

So with this whole Russian Dolls premiere attending event and my imminent inevitable celebrity, I looked in my closet and saw immediately that I was fucked. Because none of my outfits screamed glamour. Mostly because they’re too busy screaming, “hey, who knew that Laura Ashley was still in business?!” I quickly realized that I needed […]

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For Jennie

August 10, 2011

People talk about Twitter in terms of wasting time. The fleeting comments, the 140 character observations. The complaints about the weather, the what should I have for lunch, the I am bored, entertain me, oh, the world is imploding and here, let me Twitpic the pair of shoes I covet. I get it. But there’s […]

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A Slice of Life

August 9, 2011

I take the kids to tennis camp every morning on the subway. Their school is walking distance from us, so this time together on the summer-pungent NYC subway is a treat. A time when we can talk. I’m guessing that the people who don’t have kids are thinking, what do you mean? You can talk […]

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