From the monthly archives:

August 2008

Guess What?

August 5, 2008

You know how some people say “guess what?” and you say, “what?” and they immediately tell you? What is that all about? Why don’t they just come out and say what they want to say and spare you the foreplay? And does anyone ever bother guessing anymore? “You won the lottery? No? Hmm, you impregnated […]

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Throw in the Barbie

August 4, 2008

On Saturday morning I walked into my daughter’s room and nearly collapsed into a heap of nervous terror because every piece of clothing that she owned was on the floor, in a heap of nervous terror of its own. She told me that she was organizing her outfits. I have experience with this type of […]

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Campy

August 3, 2008

My kids’ camp ended last week, but not before they learned a few catchy tunes. I’m telling you, you can’t pay for this kind of thing. Except, of course, we did. Here’s a transcript of the lyrics: Aggravation (as this song is performed, any questions about the meaning of its title miraculously disappear. As does […]

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Awake

August 2, 2008

Last week, my daughter’s toe was inflamed and I took her to a podiatrist. She didn’t want to go. She would have preferred to have an ice cream sundae. I didn’t raise no damn fool, you know. But when we were there, she was so grown up, so composed and so brave. She is ten […]

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Dr. Shark Week

August 1, 2008

I am relatively new to blogging but I’ve noticed that some bloggers include photographs of doodles–their own, their children’s fantastic drawings, their gynecologist’s rendering of what is happening. Well, I’m not due for a Pap smear for another month or so, and even then I can’t guarantee results. The only artistic talents that my gynecologist […]

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